27 March 2007

You... Beta

"If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were." Richard Bach

Wow is an experience, and can be both positive and negative.

Positive wow is all about empathy, or the ability to put oneself into other's shoes. Empathy is a translation of the German term Einfühlung, meaning to feel as one with. It implies sharing the load, or "walking a mile in other's shoes," in order to appropriately understand that person's perspective.

Empathy is different from sympathy. When one is sympathetic, one implies pity but maintains distance from another person's feelings. Empathy is more a sense that one can truly understand another person's feelings. It implies feeling with a person, rather than feeling sorry for a person. Empathy heals, builds trust, and connects people together.

There is no "I" in empathy, but only "you." However, you always rank higher than I in the most commonly used English words. This implies that most people lack empathy. Why is it?

Empathy is about patience and practice. People have unlimited patience for themselves, but zero tolerance for others. You? Forget about it!

Empathy is about listening, but people like to take rather than give. You? Give me more!

Empathy requires that people be willing to question their own opinions, but people are more willing to challenge others than themselves. You? Out of question!

Empathy requires trust and that people temporarily suspend judgment. However, people always enter into a judging mode and attempt to invalidate the experience shaping others' perspective. You? Not a chance!

The value of empathy comes not from understanding others' feelings, but what is done as a result of this.

When was the last time that you did something positive for others?

Effective today, be patience, listen more, and suspend own judgment.


1 comment:

kinson lee said...

A marvelous article with explicit explanations.

Empathy takes place only on the basis of profound friendship. Except couples, how many people could show empathy to the others?

Expecting others could show empathy is unrealistic. The degree of empathic feeling is different from you and me. If you think it is enough you had paid, I don’t think so.